Poor Drayton McLane, only worth a lousy $1.6 billion (give or take a couple thousand), says in these trying economic times the Astros really can't afford to spend that much money to build a champion.

Good news, Astros fans.

Andy Pettitte, a starting pitcher, is available. And McLane won't have to break the bank - heck, he won't even have to call the bank for approval - to sign the two-time All-Star and 2001 ALCS MVP.

Don't be distracted by the reports that Pettitte told the New York Yankees he would not work for $10 million this season. That's in New York. We're in Texas.

A quick check of the cost-of-living in Houston on the site CNNmoney.com shows that $10 million in Manhattan equates to only $4,054,415 in Houston. (And it is cheaper in Deer Park, where Pettitte owns a home.)

Throw in New York state taxes versus the Republic of Texas, and heck, a man as rich as Pettitte could work for a couple million bucks and one dollar in Texas, donate the couple mil to charity - keeping the dollar - and feel better about himself than he would taking the Steinbrenners' money.

Sorry, forgot to factor in the hometown discount: cha-ching. Got change for a dollar?

Time for action

Remember when Pettitte was here and started just 15 games in 2004? You can't dog a guy for being injured, but he felt so bad about the situation that he took to hav-ing his father break the law by giving him human growth hormone to get better.

Did I mention he started only 15 games that year?

Pettitte owes you one, Astros fan. (One could argue he owes poor Drayton a few million ones, but one could not use the word poor before Drayton, could one?)

To a large extent, Roger Clemens' world has been crumbling around him after accusations of steroid use. Pettitte's world has barely been shaken after he admitted to using performance enhancers.

Is "I'm sorry" enough?

My mama always told me actions speak louder than words.

The words:

"I am sorry," Pettitte said at a news conference when he showed up at Yankees spring training last year. "I know in my heart why I did things. I know that God knows that. I know that I'm going to have to stand before Him one day. The truth hurts sometimes, and you don't want to share it. The truth will set you free. I'm going to be able to sleep a lot better."

Now, I wouldn't dare speak for God, but I'll offer Pettitte some advice.

Wouldn't you sleep a lot better if you made up for being injured in Houston by returning for a modest salary this coming season?

Return at a discount?

If Pettitte was so willing and felt he had no choice but to take performance-enhancing drugs because of an early-season injury, then he ought to be willing to play for a discount rate this season to make up for it.

A few million is equal to a few shots in the butt or stomach or wherever you admitted to taking them.

Money isn't that important to Pettitte. He'll come home.

OK, he left Houston for more money in New York, but don't be fooled. Did you see the cost-of-living issue above?

I know. A week before the Mitchell Report was released, Pettitte locked in a one-year, $16 million deal with the Yankees without letting them know he might be one of the players the re-port reported on. That's OK.

Take one for the team

Do you show up a work, go to your boss' office and tell him you were late?

After the report came out, Pettitte at least told some of the truth in a statement. He later told more of the truth. Don't know if he ever told the whole truth and nothing but, but who cares after he makes amends by signing with the Astros in the next few days?

Roy O and Chunky B wouldn't even have to take pay cuts for it to happen if Pettitte is the man he claims to be.

Happy New Year, Astros fans.